Every time I open our Whatsapp chat, to read for the hundredth time our chat, it brings back many memories. It still hurts, as it did the first time, not seeing the double-check signs in blue. It hurts seeing the sad face I sent two days after his passing, not delivered.
It hurts when I watch our shows, which we did together (even when we were in separate continents), and talk endlessly about the developments of the show, to find my self not having him around to talk for hours on end about the new episodes. It hurts when my initial reaction to a major twist in the show to call him and ask “did you see what happened?!”, just to realize he is a place with no reception. A place where our technology is useless.
I do believe he is in a better place, I really do. I also believe we all have a mission in this life, and when we achieve the goals of this mission, it is time we go. But… I am only human, and missing him, and enduring the pain of longing to see him just one more second, is only human as well. It’s funny, I sometimes wish the moment my family and I said our goodbyes, just us, and him laying peacefully in front of us, I sometimes wish that moment lasted for eternity.
Untill next time…